A New Perspective on Life

Editorial: Earlier this year, Tina shared the story of her breast cancer journey. She was first diagnosed in 2008 at the age of 41 and had no idea at the time what kind of roller coaster she was in for. Tina’s story continues below. You can catch up to where she left off by reading her previous post.

Living with Pleural Effusion

My only metastatic disease right now is pleural effusion. Unfortunately, I’ve had to stop working because the effusion returns so quickly and severely affects my ability to do my job. I get short of breath and experience a rapid pulse when I struggle to breathe. I can no longer be on my feet all day, and my job in the medical lab requires a lot of walking, which I just can’t manage anymore.

Appointments take over

Now, my life revolves around doctor appointments, X-rays to monitor the fluid, and draining procedures at the hospital every 2-3 weeks. What used to take me a day or two to do around the house now takes me an entire week. I have to really motivate myself just to get it done.

Living fully after Breast Cancer

Since my diagnosis, I’ve made a conscious choice to eliminate external stresses. Fighting cancer and struggling to breathe is already enough of a battle. I choose to be happy. I won’t wait until I feel like my life is "how it should be" to enjoy it. I’ll live life—however long that is—as happily as I can, and make the most of it.

My doctor, husband, and I have talked about focusing on the quality of my life rather than the quantity. Little things that used to irritate me—like traffic—don’t bother me anymore. I laugh them off. I just laugh them off. They’re not worth the stress, especially when I remember how important it is to live in the present.

Cherishing my family

When I got the diagnosis, my entire world changed. Some of it for the better. I’ve made time to reconnect with my three adult daughters, helping them heal old wounds from their childhood. As a parent, we often see things differently than our kids do. It’s especially important now, knowing I’m terminal, to make sure there are no regrets. I want them to say everything they need to say to me now, while I’m still here.

My husband and I have had those tough end-of-life conversations. It’s been harder for him than for me. Watching him struggle with the reality that, even though I may look fine on the outside, I’m not fine inside has been tough. Cancer sucks, but I’m determined to not let it steal my joy.

The journey continues

Since I last wrote, I’ve been drained several times. In November, my left lung collapsed, and they had to insert a chest tube. Unfortunately, it didn’t drop back down, and now my lung is what they call a “trapped lung.” They inserted an IDC so I could drain it at home, but it stopped working in early December. An ultrasound showed that not only is my pleural effusion loculated, but there are smaller areas within it that the tube can’t reach.

While my CT scans are still clear of cancer spread, the loculated areas have led my doctor to recommend restarting chemotherapy. After some consideration, I agreed to start weekly doses of Abraxane.

Retesting and moving forward

I’ve had two doses so far, but the third one was postponed due to low blood counts. We’ll retest next week (January 10, 2022) to see if my levels are back to normal. So far, the weekly Abraxane doses haven’t been too bad, though I did develop a cough. It’s starting to go away now, but if it returns, we’ll know it’s an uncommon side effect of the medication.

I continue my journey, one step at a time, and remain focused on quality over quantity.